i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
