i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
