At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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