and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
