i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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