i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
