Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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