you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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