4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
