At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
