Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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