Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize