I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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