i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I'm both gender and math confused
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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