What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
