why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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