When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Randomize
