I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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