can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize