Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
