i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
