Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize