Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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