Kiss
Puke
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
