i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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