margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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