There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Randomize
