bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize