There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
