I want you more than these girls want KFC
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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