I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize