Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize