Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
