remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
