you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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