I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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