You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
