Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
