i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
