What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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