Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize