the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
