Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
