I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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