By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I'm both gender and math confused
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
