Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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