I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I need to wash the frat house off of me
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
