I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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