Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
