he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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